Showing posts from 2013

Senior anxiety, self-indulgence and a makeover

Beauty's only skin deep, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was never going to color my hair or wear makeup everyday or ever buy products marketed to aging babyboomers that were not even on the market a decade ago -- or if they were, I didn't notice.

BB creams, spot correctors, wrinkle firm lines and pore minimizer; laser-focus wrinkle fighter, intensive night cream and moisturizer and SPF 50 and concealer and eye cream, brow enhancer, primer before foundation and so much more.

What happened?

One day, with way too much time on my hands, on a whim I went to a department store cosmetics counter and ordered a woman in a deceptively reassuring white lab coat to give me a makeover.

The works. Look better, feel better was my justification.

She was a salesperson and I was a sucker.

When she finished I looked fabulous -- alert, bright-eyed and flawless. I walked out a few dollars poorer -- with everything she applied to my face along with detailed step-by-step instructions for how to apply every si…

Holy Friday, it's Easter Weekend

Good Friday was a company holiday, which is a bit like a bonus win. It sneaks up on you and it could come on any given Friday in the Spring. I spent my bonus day finishing one dreadful task and beginning another fun one.

Let's start with the dreadful -- shelling out a few hundred dollars to pickup my complicated tax returns.
While the cost came as a blow, it was worth it.

The very delightful tax pro shined a light on things that would never have occurred to me and brought an end to a huge, throbbing headache.

For the past decade or so, I'd been using TurboTax, which is fine when everything is the same year in and year out.

 I started out with TurboTax this year but quickly sought professional help when the running tally at the top of the page showed I owed $23,000 in federal taxes! My head had been pounding ever since. I'd already started obsessing over how I could possibly  manage a payment plan while drowning in deep, depressing, debilitating debt.

What did i do wron…

2013 starts like 2012

It's kinda like the film "Ground Hog Day"-- the concept, not the comedy.

A year later, I find myself back in the same place where I was on this date in 2012 ... saddened by the deteriorating condition of a loved one and the heavy, hopeless feeling you get from not being able to do anything to help them.

Again, I find myself struck by the inability to find the words to express how I feel about the one who's struggling.
Again, I'm experiencing the deep sorrow of not knowing how to comfort others who share my sense of loss.

But in many ways,  after exactly 365 days of coping with what I'm sure will be the greatest loss I'll ever face, I'm better prepared to handle what lies ahead.

What have I learned in this past year? That you can't will away feelingsThat loss and the pain that comes with it is inevitableThat it's okay to cry whenever you feel like it  That courage and living every day with purpose is admirableThat every one's life touches s…